18 Absurd Rules For Ladies During World Cup

The # WorldCup Is approaching & we'd like to clarify a few things and set some very simple straight rules...

1. you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
2. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't
mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting
me.
3. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require
a refill of my drink or something to eat. If you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell on the floor, It won't happen.
4. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk
to me during halftime but only when the.commercials are on, and only if the half time scores is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one" game; hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
5. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again, Many
times.
6. Tell YOUr girlfriends not to wed, have babies, fall sick or die during #WorldCup. We won't go!!!
7. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house
on a Sunday to
watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
8. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as
important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this, why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch?" because, the reply will be, "Refer to Rule
#1 of this list".
9. Kenya didn't qualify..AND there is a 5 hour time difference between Rio De Janeiro & East
Africa so please... NO stupid questions.
10. Ronaldo the Brazilian & Ronaldo the Portuguese are not related.
11. Its the #WorldCup & there is no Arsenal or Barcelona. It happens once in four years so don't ask if its the same as the game from last
week...
12. We shall watch any soap, reality show, romantic, African, Afro cinema movie as long as they shoot it in Brazil & the cast are from
World Cup participating teams...for any exceptions refer to rule #1
13. For the full #WorldCup period, the remote control shall reside in my pocket and shall only be operated by me else under my written authority or consent...
14. There shall be no comments about Christiano Ronaldo's looks. Professionalism shall remain an absolute part of the #WorldCup.
15. If you miss the line-up presentation, please do not ask... "who is that guy?"
16. Everyone shall learn all soccer rules prior to the #WorldCup. Any questions like, "why is that guy running on the line waving a
checkered flag?" will not be tolerated.
17. if you get stuck on the road call 911 or triple A.
18. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the
World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because before and after this comes the Champions League,
Premier League, Spanish League, KPL, Grand Prix, Tri Nations.
Thank you...
Kind Regards,
GENTLEMAN'S ASSOCIATION